Thursday, July 3, 2014

Toddlers and Tantrums


Parenting is like hurdle races - constantly jumping over obstacles and mastery is deceptive because just when you think you have conquered that obstacle, another one comes along. 

We have all heard, read, seen and experienced parenting that relates to consistent practices, boundaries, loving support, discipline, blah blah blah... I am going to talk about BRIBERY.

Yes, a lot of my parenting involves bribery negotiation. The approaches I employ are highly dependent on the situation, the mood and time of the day. 

Honestly, negotiating with toddlers before the crack of dawn is frustratingly impossible and the same goes for the late afternoon when tempers may well be frayed beyond repair without the aid of any "refreshment". Sometimes, locking myself in the toilet while the twins bang and howl on the other side of the door is time out for me before I scream blardy murder for the umpteen time.

Toddler: I don't want to wear pants. I want to wear a skirt!
Me: It's very cold out there. Put on your pants and you can wear your skirt on top of that! 

Toddler: I don't want to eat dinner! 
Me: Finish your dinner and you can have jelly. No dinner means no jelly.

Toddler: I don't want to share! It's MINE!
Me: You must share if not I will take your {insert favourite toy} away!!!

Toddler: AAAHHHHHHHH... I CAN'T DO IT! *followed by epic tantrum on the floor*
Me: YES YOU CAN! Try again and I will help you. 

Toddler: I don't like HIM/HER! I don't friend HIM/HER!
Me: That is not nice! You keep that up and you won't get to watch your favourite TV series today. Say SORRY!
Toddler: NO!!!! I DON'T WANT TO SAY SORRY!!!! I WANT TO WATCH MY SHOW!
Me: TOO BAD! NO SORRY means NOTHING NICE for you today!

Toddler: *throwing massive tantrum and refuses to tell me why*
Me: My ears and brain hurt. Please go to your room. No one wants to hear and see that.
Toddler: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Me: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. Go to your room right now OR calm down because you are driving us CRAZY!

Toddlers are not always tantrum throwing little people. They are mostly wonderfully inquisitive, highly engaging and deeply affectionate. I love mine dearly and like them even more when they are not throwing tantrums. Get my drift? There's certainly never a dull moment and that's why we appreciate and never under value the good times, ever!

I came across the following via social media and laughed out loud. It sums out parenting perfectly:


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