Thursday, August 14, 2014

My failure to keep calm


It was a midweek public holiday and the skies were a gorgeous hue of blue without a cloud in sight. 

Daniel & I are wearing his favourite colours and this is his first amusement ride. He sports a most radiant smile and a brilliant set of chompers (I think).  

Daniel enjoys smiling for the camera and when excited, can be seen jumping on his feet - flapping his arms like a bird - throwing his head back in laughter.

We had a lovely morning and note with pride that my children love amusement rides just like their daddy. I, on the other hand, shut my eyes throughout the experience and thank goodness, my stomach was empty!

That lovely first half of the day gave way to a most mentally and emotionally exhaustive 1.5 hours in the afternoon all because he refused to let a substantial toy out of his hands. That meant, he couldn't go on a bike ride with his daddy and sister which translated to a MASSIVE MELTDOWN from him and eventually me.

I am certainly not known for my patience and am notorious for my outbursts. 

He asked to be cuddled.

I cuddled while he cried and screamed in my ears while rubbing his snotty nose and tears into my top.

I tried the usual comfort words. Reasoned with him. Rubbed his back. Distracted him. Nothing worked.

I put him down, walked away and he followed me screaming - crying. 

Then, the cycle of cuddling him while he cried and screamed in my ears while rubbing his snotty nose and tears into my top. I did this 5 times. All the while telling myself to stay calm and not lose the plot.

I removed myself from the living areas of our home and retreated into the bedroom to lay my head because I could feel myself losing the plot.

The crying and shouting went on and on ..... eventually, I snapped.

I SCREAMED at my son for being unreasonable, naughty and plain ridiculous.

Did I feel better after screaming? Yes and No.
Did it work? No.

Then I looked at the clock, it was dinner time.
I served him dinner and he sat down calmly. Miraculously. Perhaps he was hungry?
Daniel proceeded to eat his dinner nicely and quietly.
After his first mouthful of food, he turned to me:

"Mummy, I am sorry.
Daniel is a naughty boy."

Then he kissed my hand and smiled. 
I smiled on my face and in my heart.
We cuddled and kissed.
All was well and calm.

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