About Me and My Entourage

I blog in the hope that I do not forget them and hold onto the belief that random thoughts & experiences involving children are significant. 

For those of you who have been following my blog, I thank you for taking a keen interest in our lives. Parenting is busy and tough, and it is also fraught with loneliness and confusion. Therefore, let's keep sharing and laughing through this life altering privilege called parenthood!

In the beginning
It was just the two of us. He was already working and I was in my final year at Uni. We hung out socially with the same group and gravitated towards each other through conversation and ease of company. The year was 2000. Two years later, we were engaged and yes, he asked my daddy for my hand in marriage (old fashion stuff and brilliant tradition to keep). In 2003, we were married in the presence of an intimate gathering of 50 family and friends (we used SARS as the excuse for not hosting a second wedding in Singapore, the country of my birth *phew*) and went on a most splendid honeymoon to the North & South Islands of New Zealand.

In the middle (this is the long part)
We enjoy stable careers, quiet evenings at home with the occasional outing, intimate dinner parties at home and annual holidays that took our breaths away. Life was rosy and there was nothing missing in our lives.

Three years into the marriage, we spoke about children. We both want children at some point in our lives and it wasn't a deal breaker if we couldn't. If we couldn't have biological kids, we wouldn't adopt and will simply enjoy a fantastic life with each other. Simple enough right? No.

What would seem to be my birth right as a woman appears not to be that straight forward after all. We needed help to fall pregnant. Quite a lot of help. Medications, injections, creams, herbal concoctions, acupunctures, laparoscopy, ovarian drillings (twice), artificial inseminations (10 times), 5 IVF cycles and 1 heart-breaking miscarriage.

I (finally) fell pregnant with twins on the fourth year of fertility treatments while still performing at my peak at work, went on maternity leave at 28 weeks and carried the pregnancy to full-term.

Charlotte and Daniel joined our family two days after my 33rd birthday. Yes, you could say that they were and will always be the perfect birthday presents. All of us came home together after 4 days in hospital.

The husband was and still is very hands on. Together for six whole weeks, we were on our own. Getting to know our children - feeding, changing, burping, bathing, cuddling, kissing, smelling, cleaning whilst at the same time, doing housework, grocery shopping, sleeping up to 2 hours per day, putting the kids on a routine, trying not to walk into walls, driving carefully on the road despite the fog in our eyes and brains, etc. You name it, we have done it. All on our own and we are darn proud about it. Six week later, the husband returned to work and my mummy came and helped me out for 4 months. I thoroughly enjoyed those months as a Stay At Home Mummy...although I have to admit, I also enjoyed having the distraction of work in the form of short-term projects which gave my brain a desperately needed workout while my mummy was with us. When she left, all short-term projects were shelved and I became a FULL-TIME Stay At Home Mummy.

When childcare placements became available for my children at my preferred centre and on days of my choosing, I knew that was the sign for me to return to work earlier than anticipated (I had taken 13 months leave from work).

My children have been in childcare 4 days a week since they were 9 months young. Charlotte was only starting to sit up then and Daniel was still lying on his back! I am very lucky that my children are still happy at child care and love going to "school!"

The present
With reliable childcare, a supportive husband and a supportive work environment, I continue to work 4 days a week (from 6:15am - 2:15pm) and am able to spend quality time with my children and husband. Yes, it can be tiring, stressful and challenging some moments in a day and up to a few weeks at a time...still, I have the freedom of choice.

The choice to try for children and to be blessed with them.
The choice to go back to work and to have my work/family choices accepted.
The choice to be happy and content.
The choice to let clean laundry pile up and only sort & fold them 3 nights later.
The choice to say no and yes. I don't have to fit everything in.

That's why I am happy. Life is short and let's continue to convert every obstacle into opportunities.

This is my life and I love it.

Again, thank you for reading this blog.

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